He Thought He Could Help

Born in April of 1985, Jordan was the apple of his momma's eye. He was the second of 3 children born to my sister at a very young age.
Not only was he the apple of her eye, he was the spitting image, near total genetic makeover, of his mother. The only difference, he was a boy and a little taller than her 5'1" stature.
Gorgeous, very self assured at most times, and a friend to everyone, Jordan had a bright future ahead of him.
He was an avid skateboarder and a pretty good sketch artist too. The girls were all over him throughout his final two years of high school.
Jordan just love people. And that made him a valued associate to Pac Sun and the American Eagle stores in our local mall.
As a child, there was never a dull moment when he was around. Talk about explorer! One of the funniest things I remember about him, that we all do, was the incident where he got bored pushing his hot wheels around. I'm figuring he saw one too many hot wheels racetrack commercials. One day when he was supposed to be taking a nap with his mom, he decided to put a couple of his little hot wheels in the microwave. Back then, most microwaves had the turntables in them. Get where I'm going?
Well, he just "wanted to make them go round and round", LOL, ornery.
He thought he won the race when the fire alarm went off in the kitchen. He was giggling and jumping up and down and clapping his hands.
He was less than 3 years old then.
Jordan's mom was 2 years younger than me. By the time I had graduated high school, she had one baby, was married, and living in housing.
She hadn't finished high school at that time, and in another year and a half she would have Jordan, who was her second child, all by the time she should have been graduating high school.
I had graduated by then and had a great job in a local factory. I didn't have any children, and as far as I knew at that time, I wasn't going to. So by then I had snatched up and spoiled all 4 of my nieces and nephews.
I loved going shopping each week and buying them all the things I would never buy my own. You have this idea in your head of what it will be like when you have your own, all the things you want to do with them.
So rather than be depressed about it, I loaded them all up with love and toys.

 I'm a bartender at one time, who found herself taunted and picked on through the drive thru attached to the bar, by a bunch of teens who had been sold to at one time. Confusing, I know.
It was a little hick bar. The former owners and workers all had kids in the neighborhood. I was told by a few customers that it had always been customary of the bartenders to sell beer or alcohol to their own kids back when, as "they knew they would go straight home, and it was better that way" because they knew where they were when drinking????
Whatever! What in the heck are they drinking for to begin with??
 There's a new sheriff in town now, and she was willing to kick some adult arses for what was going on.
I remember one of the girls getting pissed because I wouldn't hand off a case of beer to her kids through the drive-thru. So she waits till the next girl comes in, calls her kid up, buys the case, and then walks it out into the parking lot to give them to take home and party on. I was ready to drop her right there, but the owner stepped in, pulled me aside, and reminded me that there were camera's out there to do the job of "catching them red handed".
She wasn't the only one doing that. It didn't take me long to figure out where all the kids in that area were getting their alcohol.
One night a bunch of them ran through the drive thru and pounded their fists upon the walls of the drive thru, knocking loads of stock and cigarettes to the floor. What a mess. Oh well.
This part of the story is in here, because to this day, I would rather spit in the faces of all of those adults for what happened to Jordan on that night, that end of June hot summer night.  They are all a little shadey too, but I don't let that stop me from voicing what I witnessed. Not if I think it will save someones life. The life of another teen.

 I remember my sister getting calls often from Jordan asking to be picked up from somewhere, or telling her he was spending the night.  99% of the time, she knew exactly where he was. I wonder if it ever sank into her brain sometimes, all the things I had told her about the kids that he was hanging out with, all the derilect parents in charge of those other kids.
I will tell you now, it is ALWAYS worth it to speak your mind, to report to someone what you see going on.
If ya piss em' off, then you just do.
Especially if there is a possibility that their actions will put someone else in harms way.
You think that it will be okay? Because they are all "friends" and they will take care of one another? Don't be such a fool.

If you think that alcohol won't lead to other substance abuse, you are wrong. At any party, at any given time, where there is alcohol, there is always something else. You get a bunch of 18 year olds together, partying it up after graduating and returning from an awesome senior trip, and you're going to have some kind of trouble.
And that's just what happened too.
A fight breaks out between a couple of Jordan't friends, and he steps in to break it up.
Not only does he step into the fight, he walks right into the path of a knife.
Where did it come from? And why were there SEVERAL knife wounds?
Why didn't the other friend try to stop it?
How could you stand next to a friend who had just prevented that knife from sticking you, and watch them be stabbed and slashed several times?
Why would you pick a fight with someone who is not only drunk, but high?
Parents, if you think you know just exactly what is going on when your kids are hanging out with friends, you're dead wrong !
Know not just the kids your child is hanging out with, know their parents also.
Just because you did some crazy and foolish stuff when you were their age, doesn't make it okay for you to let your kids do the same.
Some people say it is wrong to judge a child by their parent's actions. But I say, from personal experience, that "that apple don't fall far from the tree".
Educate yourself about the town in which you live, the types of people who live in it, grown or young.
Jordan wasn't perfect. He was out doing "all the stuff others his age were doing".
He wasn't doing much different than what his own parents had been doing at that age.
He was being himself though, trying to fix everyone and everything.
And for that, he paid with his life.

 Forever 18, resting eternally in a grave as your friends party on.
I try to make it a point to never let my girls go anywhere with a friend or friends unless I have first met their parent or parents.
I'm hoping that what they suffered when their cousin passed away remains seared into their brains for a good reason. That they will know that if alcohol or anything else is present in any situation they find themselves, they need to leave. Never step in and try to help when someone is high.
Alcohol and drugs inhibit a persons mind to the point at times that they don't even remember what has happened.
I hope that they tell their cousin's story. That they spread their emotions over it all upon their friends. That what they know, they tell, and it makes a difference.

 Parents, talk to your kids about drugs and alcohol. Make them understand that it is never funny to watch a friend who is incapacitated by the effects of drugs and alcohol.
Make them watch the gory, and very real videos of drunk driving accidents. Make them go to Jordan's memorial site, and read of all the pain that one night of fun has cost a family and friends.

http://jordan-harrison.memory-of.com/Tributes.aspx